We all have our likes and dislikes. A show of hands, please:
Who loves a gruesome horror flick?
Who loves a spine-tingling thriller?
Who loves a sweet historical romance?
Who loves a tear-jerker drama?
Who loves a panty-wet erotic romance?
If you raised your hand to all of the above, lucky you! Plus, note that this post is NOT directed to you, but read on because you might know someone to whom this is directed.
Why the pinball questions above? To show that we all have different tastes. Even if, for example, I like a sweet historical, but the thought of picking one up makes you gag, we could still be friends, right? We all can't like the same things. I'm still the same person, the same Mom, the same wife and daughter as I was before you knew my treasured interests. Now, if we both happen to like the same things, great. We could become friends faster, but even then, our likes are going to diverge. And. That's. Okay.
Step two, our likes are personal. We don't always share our personal likes with our families, or specifically, our kids. Sometimes because people around us aren't "into" our likes. Sometimes, we are prudent and know that our likes are adult in nature, and our kids are not adults. They are kids, with innocent minds and lives and we want to preserve this for as long as possible.
Another question: Would you take your little one (and I'm talking elementary-to-middle school age especially) to see any of the Jason movies? Would you discuss details of your sex life in the school's lunchroom? Would you hand your beginning reader your latest copy of Erotic BedTime Stories?
Of course not! At least, I would hope not!
I shake my head, however, at the number of ignorant people out there who believe just this. Why? Because I - we - read and write erotic romance. Yes, the "E" word. Erotica. Erotic. Exotica. Call it what you will. If you're still in the dark, I'm talking about books that contain graphic sex between consensual ADULTS where the plot lies in developing relationships and love and mutual respect.
If you are not into this, hey, fine. That's your thing. I CAN RESPECT YOUR DECISION. I'm not going to shove this down your throat. We don't have to discuss our reading tastes at all. But don't you dare brag about knowing someone who's a writer, then turn around and cut me off because you believe I write "porn," and you're suddenly too good to associate with me. The fact that you think any revealing sex qualifies as porn, shows how ignorant (and I'm being nice here) you are. Save face and keep quiet, okay.
And, and, (yes, I'm steamed now), let's not forget that since I am now apparently scum, my kids can no longer associate with your kids, because my kids will corrupt your kids. PLEASE.
I stand firm on my soap box, raise the megaphone to my lips and forcefully pronounce, "GROW UP, PEOPLE!!" I mean, just because you obviously never have sex, and your offspring must have been adopted because in your view sex is the ultimate sin, doesn't mean it doesn't exist. It doesn't mean I share every stinkin' detail of my life with my kids.
Really. Do you?
Okay. I'm cool now. Had to get that off my chest. If you know people like this, give me a high-five, because I know I can't be the only one. If you haven't met individuals like this, count yourself lucky.
Disclaimer: While I did get on my soapbox in this post, it is all in the name of hypocrisy. In day-to-day life, I am more quiet. For example, only a small, tiny handful of people who know me, know what I write. It does burn me up. It's my hope that my deep belief in this subject will eventually work its way out to encompass all of me. Oh, you want to know why I keep quiet, day-to-day? Honestly, it's so I don't have to worry about my kids being ostracized when they'd have no idea why. It's a sad, sad world we live in.